Tuesday 10 May 2011

ERIKAAAAA!! FUCK YEAHHH!!!!

Sup, musicfagzz!!

This be Erika speaking. You may know me from such blogs as BRBGOINGINSANE and.... well, that's pretty much shit. I mean 'it'. FUCK!! The PryON in me is taking over.... ¬_¬

(Ooh errr.... "PryON in me" ~ herpderp. 0_0 )

I know jackshit about sound engineering. And I have shit taste in music. Just sayin'

BUT READ ANYWAYS, DAMMIT!! 
OR I SWEAR TO LUCIFER AND HIS ARMY THAT
I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND CUT YOU!!

Sooooo.... I'm not that musical a person. I play a little acoustic from time to time. Just random shit. Mostly acoustic anarcho-punk. YEAH!! FIGHT THE POWER!!!!

And as some of you may have noticed... THOUGH YOU PROBABLY HAVEN'T CUS NO ONE HERE REALLY GIVES A SHIT..... I did write that one controversial line in my PryON song about raping dead babies. I DO NOT CONDONE THIS BTW!! DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU HEAR!!! But yeah.... Apart from that kinda shit, I never really know what to write songs about. 

And when I do, they come out shitty anyways.... NO, I AM NOT BUTTHURT. GO FUCK YOURSELVES!! (with a cheesegrater.... or something equally as painful. Then come fuck ME! Because, indeed, my pussy does smell like lemon and lime. But that's just because my cunt cream CONSISTS of lemon and lime. And I would like to hear you scream as my vaginal juices seep into your open wounds.....)





SO THIS IS HOW I MAKE MY SHIT AWESOME!!!:

1) It always helps to be as out of tune as possible. Then people can't rage at you for being out of tune because it is so blatantly INTENTIONALLY out of tune and you can throw that in their face. Along with other substances....

2) Create a friggin' awesome video for your musicz! This will distract your audience from your lack of musical talent and they will only remember your song for the music video. Just turn on MTV and watch the boobies bouncing up and down, then close your eyes and actually listen to the track. Yeah, you'll know what I mean....

3) MAKE YOURSELF AS VISUALLY APPEALING AS POSSIBLE! If you're hot, nobody gives a shit about how retarded your music is. Just turn on MTV and.... wait, I've said this. 

4) ??????

5) PROFIT!!!!!!! CONGRATU-FUCKIN'-LATIONS! Everybody loves you now, you have zee best musicz in zee worldz, and your mama would be so proud. I think you deserve that line of cocaine now. For you are now...... 

UNTOUCHABLE!

Here, have a rainbow!!
This is what PryON and I would look like
if we were FURIOUS MOUNTAIN LIONS!!
<333333333

14 comments:

  1. HAHAHAHAHAHA I am commenting on my own post!

    But I don't feel bad about it because it's on YOUR BLOG!!!

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahaaaaaa..... (gets quieter as I run off into the night like Batman)

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  2. I condone and endorse all statements in the above post (except about you going and fucking Erika - that would make me sad and then jealous and then angry and then stalkery and then murderery and then jailed and stuff).

    Seriously - in the weeks of fucking awful complicated and contradictory advice doled out on this blog, finally we have something here the people can easily grasp and benefit from.

    Thanks Erika. I <3 you (squee) and one day we shall get furious just like that, under a rainbow or two.

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  3. ILY PRYON!!!

    <3456...INFINITY +1 !!!!

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  4. Some of the wisest and most truthful words ever spoken my brother.
    Hear me.
    LawwdAmen!

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  5. your list is spot on.
    she seems to know more about music than you pryon =x

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  6. I still dont know jack diddly shit about sound sound mixing but its good to see Erika taking a crack at it. lol.

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  7. Furious Montain Lions indeed...

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  8. Ed.
    What did I say?
    She is spot fucking on.

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  9. You forgot to include auto-tune. Because if anyone is going to be baller, it's fucking some dude who auto-tuned that shit out of a song

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  10. damn having to correct the typo and get here just to get a does of erika <.<

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  11. Thanks for the rainbow!!! But I don't have bewbs :(
    A well you can always hire some booby-girls ;)

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  12. Energetic one, aren't you?

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  13. If you are intelligent and beautiful you just can't fail.

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